Monday should be Teacher Appreciation Day.

Some advice I wish I had this morning?

(image via we♥it)

1.) Never leave your cell phone where your students can get it. They have no qualms about calling and/or texting you ALL. DAY. LONG. Nor do they mind passing it around to their friends. You know, just in case they need homework help. Or advice on dumping their 12 year old boyfriend. Relatedly...

2.) If you act interested in their social lives for EVEN ONE SECOND, you are their bestest friend forevers and will be confided in for the rest of the school year, whether you like it or not.

3.) Never assume that they know not to chase snakes. Or not to reach into drain pipes saying "I THINK HE WENT IN HERE, GUYS!"

4.) Neither should you assume that any article of food is ever more than two seconds away from becoming a juice spraying, sauce glopping projectile, heading straight for the white blouse you painstakingly ironed this morning.

5.) Manners are a thing of the past. If you see a 12 year old barrel down the 75 year old English teacher on their way out of the cafeteria, don't assume that the child has been informed that this is a bad thing.

6.) As a matter of fact, the ONLY thing you should assume is that you are going to have a hectic day.

7.) Despite all this, at the end of the week, they're just kids, you love them and they probably like you.

8.) Actually, they might hate you. But when they are 30 and sending their own kids to school, or maybe working as teachers themselves, they are going to think back and say, "Boy. Ms. Kelly sure had it rough with me. I'm glad she taught me the correct vowel sounds anyway." (Despite the fact that she has been tempted to make up random facts in the hopes that someday that one kid would get his just desserts .)